Taking applications IRL friendship

I am lonely for friends. I am lonely for the simple, reciprocal joy of sharing and being heard—of talking through an ordinary day or a profound thought, and having someone genuinely listen, not to fix, but to understand. I miss the interaction with my grandkids and even with my grown kids.

I realize now that I have a tendency to isolate, not out of choice, but almost by default, and I desperately miss the casual, life-affirming nourishment of platonic relationships. And then there is the future—the significant other. My desire to eventually be vulnerable with a partner is not about filling a void; it is about reaching a place where I feel whole enough to open up and share my authentic self with someone who sees and accepts me. It is the hope of finding that person with whom I can finally let down the final walls, share the landscape of my inner world, and know, without a doubt, that I am being heard and truly seen.

Eight months is a significant measure of time—a season of intense, necessary solitude that I have dedicated to healing and sitting with myself. I recognize the work I’ve done; I have faced the difficult truths and allowed myself to feel the pain, even when it was deeply uncomfortable and jarring. This period of isolation hasn't been wasted; it has been a crucible where I've started to forge a stronger, more independent self. I can honestly say I am moving forward, even if the path is not always clear. Yet, this space I’ve created—this necessary distance for healing—has also exposed a profound ache: loneliness. I've tried to treat this loneliness with a "grain of goodness," recognizing that time alone is vital for self-recalibration. The solitude was, and still is, a critical tool for recovery. But that initial, protective need for space has curdled into a genuine, heavy isolation. I'm having a painful realization: it's not just the absence of my ex that hurts, but the absence of any true, sustained connection in my daily life.

So here into the void I will shout "time to make yourself a little more available and even maybe a little more eye contact it's okay trust yourself"