Im leaving

Im leaving im leaving im done im leaving. All that time, all those good and bad memories, they will still exist, they are still mine. But I have to live for future me now, i cant live for past me and all her wants and wishes. Its not worth it anymore. The bad memories are too much and they never end. I can no longer accept thay i have a partner that has made me feel physically scared by throwing beer bottles and plates, called me slow, stupid and weak, hated me forming close friendships, shut me out for weeks, belittled me in front of others and established so many double standards I couldn't even keep track anymore. After couples therapy and countless hours of individual therapy I am out of ideas. My friends even had an intervention with me to tell me that they have been worried about me for years. I have an opportunity to turn my life around. Even if I dont find love I want I dont care. Life alone is better than whatever this is. I shouldn't have to suffer so much pain for love. I would rather just not have love at all if it means this.