A fantasy costed my mental health

20F here,

So I m in a college currently pursuing my BTech and I m in 3rd year now So the story goes like i live in a 2 sharing room and I find my roommate let's say X very cute and I m attracted towards her . for ur information the rooms get changed every year and roomates gets allocated randomly So what happened exactly is when she was sleeping I put my hands on her stomach in the dark and she suddenly woke up and asked what I was doing then I had no option left with me and told her I like her and then She screamed No… get away!" she choked out, She was sobbing and told I need to sleep and went to sleep My own body, still paralyzed felt a cold dread sleep thinking about the blunder I did and went to sleep too. Anyways now i can't write because I feel lonely and depressed it feels like a traumatic experience and I can't even talk with her now I m feeling so low that I can't even eat properly and this mischief has costed me my all friends too