So bad at denying myself an orgasm

I wake up every morning with my cock hard and throbbing wanting to be touched, I tell myself no and about 20 seconds later my hand is touching it without me even thinking and then once I realise I’ve started I just give in being up Reddit and stroke. This then leads to me wanting to edge, because it’s fun to goon and leak and be super horny, then comes the point of cumming and I’m so ready to blow and I tell myself again no you’re not cumming yet, then that changes to “maybe just a ruin” and then I commit to this thought and allow myself a ruined orgasm but as soon as I feel myself go over the edge even with my hands off and cock just twitching and cum on its way out I can’t help but put my hand back on and pump my load out and give myself a full orgasm anyway. Im addicted to edging and denial but cumming just feel too good and I am starting to just accept I have no self control haha