[1225] Chapter One of Liora and Theo

Hi this is my first chapter and I am looking for notes on if you like my characters and would you keep reading? All thoughts are helpful to me.

Chapter 1: Liora and Theo - Google Docs

I have done two critiques.

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1ottzep/comment/noabuw4/?context=3

https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1ottzep/comment/noabuw4/?context=3