Vent

My husband and I have been fighting a lot recently. He's trying to quit smoking and it's just made things very tense between us. This morning we had a huge blow up. I came downstairs and the baby who is 8 months old was alone in the pack and play propped up on a Bobby watching SpongeBob while he was outside having a smoke. I was upset and I told him to not leave her in a Bobby in the pack and play that she would need to be alone in there or just have one toy and he should have the camera on her. We only have one camera. It's up above her crib but it can be easily taken off the wall and repositioned other places. He got really upset and said how I'm not watching her every second of the day and he just really went off on me. I took baby upstairs to remove her from the situation and he left for work. I called him while he was on his way to work to ask him to go somewhere and cool off first. He proceeded to yell at me for the next 10 minutes how I'm always doing this to him and I purposely ruin weekends and I'm always unhappy. The whole time he kept saying "where is the baby? Why aren't you watching her?" And I told him she was right in front of me and then he would say "why the fuck are you crying like that in front of her, you are traumatizing her". He said the only two things in life that bring him joy at this point is the baby and smoking and I've absolutely ruined smoking for him. He also smokes weed which I don't care about but lately he comes in and says he's only been smoking weed but he smells like cigarettes and freaks if I say anything. Btw when he smokes anything, I make him wear a full boiler suit and hat. Then when he comes inside, he detoxes by washing his hands and face and mouthwashes. He also has PTSD from childhood abuse and being in the army, so the weed has always helped with that. He watches her alone once a week while I'm at work and somedays I don't think the camera or camera monitor has moved even though he swears he brings them downstairs and that he only has a smoke when she's napping. I'm so upset today. I was really looking forward to my day off with her. I know I'm far from perfect and can certainly push his buttons without meaning to but how could I not say something this morning?! He absolutely can't do that. I don't understand why it was such a huge deal to say so and ask why didn't you just bring her up to me in bed??