Microdiscectomy of L4-5 finally scheduled after 12 years of pain & PT; seeking post-op tips

Hello! 32 F 5'8" 175 pounds It's been 12 years since I first injured my back, and 5 years since I've been able to sit on a couch. I finally have my microdiscectomy scheduled for Dec 17th on my L4-5. I've been injured for a long time and im nervous about messing up my recovery post-op. Since I went so long being ignored, I have a hard time knowing what is and isn't "normal pain." And a bad habit of just doing things myself w/o help because of not being taken seriously for over a decade: Crawling around my home when it hurt too much to get up, doing dishes from a tub as I knelt on the floor, showering to clean myself after going to the bathroom, watching TV standing or from laying on the floor, standing at the bar at restaurants, etc.

I've been in pelvic PT, regular PT 3x, and spinal restoration PT throughout my 12 years of injury.

I currently live in a two story rental with a partner who is very supportive and scolds me for being too independent. Our bedroom & shower are on the 2nd floor. We have two cats and a med/large dog at home. My partner plans on taking on all home chores. We live up north but there's no ice on our sidewalks, *yet.

What tips, tricks, devices, methods would you all recommend for my first few days home? HOW do I not bend over? I already try not to but im so scared ill forget. I work from home at a standing desk. How much PTO would you recommend taking? About how long will I not be able to tend to my animals and home? Will I need a walker? I've been a cane user the last 5 years. Are my home stairs going to be a problem? How do I stay busy so I don't go stir crazy? These past few years have been hard already, I used to be a marathon runner and haven't been able to run since 2019. I'm nervous being more restricted is going to mess with my head. Will I need help getting dressed? What will I be able to do to stay busy? (Again, very scared im going to accidentally bend)

Very excited to finally get some relief. Would so appreciate tips & tricks from people who have already been through it. Thanks!