AITAH for accusing my mom and brother of manipulating me to avoid accountability for how they treat me

For context, our family comes from a very bad an traumatizing divorce. Our father drunkenly beat all of us infront of each other, ruined my mom's life and ran smear campaigns on her in order to win custody, and I strongly believe he SA'd all of us considering his best and only friend is currently serving 20 consecutive life sentences for child molestation, my mom says he caught him showing my biggest brother (not this one) porn, and all of us show extreme manifestations of SA that I won't get into the details for, and that my father was aggressively verbally abused, degraded, told he wasn't shit, and compared to his successful big sister. I believe this is why my brother is so depressed, but l've never gotten the courage to talk to him about if we got SA'd.

His depression has always been a problem for me and affected me deeply. Not just his smell because he truly never showers (it really is putrid), but him leaving trash completely littered all over the entire house. When he is done with something, he simply leaves it there. This includes his piles of dirty dishes, which I have done for him an uncountable amount of times. I care for him and I feel bad that he suffers from this, but I don't think he wants to do a single thing about it. He left my dad's house when he was 18, now he's 21. His habits have not changes and I can't see him trying at all.

I ran away from my dad's house around 5 months ago since I turned 18, was allowed to read the court documents finally, and I rapidly changed my opinions about my family. Since l've been here, l've been borrowing my brothers car to get to work and for daily use, l've been detailing almost weekly (admittedly because of my slight lil ocd tendencies, I like cleaning), I've been the only person filling up his gas tank for these 5 months, and the only person bringing it be inspected and things like that.

A few weeks ago, I left the car in the first key position for too long, and the battery. I called AAA to get it jumpstarted, and was telling my mom about it. He told me the battery should replaced, but he didn't seem to make a big deal out of it. I continued to drive it to and from the gym because I had been forced to quit my job due to horrible treatment of me, and l've been looking for a job since. I admit, this is my mistake. He sent me money to get the battery changed, and I neglected it because I never had any issues with the battery since. This is completely my fault and I take full accountability. I've told them this many many many times.

While I left the car at my friends house while we were celebrating Halloween at a college campus that's a state away. Before I left, I asked my brother if I could leave the car overnight. He said I could, and that's where the messages start. As I was returning home, it was as I entered the neighborhood that the fuel light went on. I chose to just finish driving the car home because my brother had made it seem he needed it as soon as possible. So, I told him when I got that the car fuel light was on, but he'd had enough gas to get where he was going and back, and l'd fill it up once he was once done.

Please keep in the mind that he texted me in the middle of the night of Halloween saying he needed the car before noon the next morning. (He and my mom later clarified he meant noon)

It is also important to mention that my brother moved in his partner I believe 4 months ago, convincing my mom by telling her he was going to be sent to a gay->straight conversion camp in 1 week, and he would start paying rent within 3 weeks of him moving here. It’s been I believe 4 months, and he still hasn’t tried to get a job. I have no idea whether or not he was going to be sent to a conversion camp, but my brother has always been extremely manipulative and me and mom mother have spoken on several occasions about how much he takes after our dad, especially considering the matching child-hood trauma.

This message alone has not contained ANYTHING of what I’m upset about. It was weeks after I continued to be stuck at home, without a mode of transportation, and my brother clearly saw this, that I began to grow resentful, and I made it clear to both of them that because Dominic has a perfectly fine car now, and he still sees me suffering like this, that I stop taking care of him like I used to. I begin telling my mom how much I disagree with the way they are both allowing this situation to be handled, that’s it’s not fair to me, and that I wouldn’t be putting up with Dominic like I used to. I won’t allow him to be the wreck that his is to the house with absolutely no adversity anymore. To me, it seems my mother will defend my brother relentlessly, no matter what. These texts get very heated, and accusations she throws at me are imaginable fucked up.

Also important to mention, I started feeling this way only after I’ve spent 50% of the money (1.5k/3k) I’ve been saving to buy my own vehicle with on food and other things, and that I realize this isn’t sustainable for me. When I realized, I finally got the willpower to fight off my addiction, I started antidepressants, and I’ve been sober since. All that of that is before I sent a single text.

I’m currently in the process of adding the messages to Imgur, but there’s a LOT. Probably 70 screenshots of texts. Here’s the link to the first section:

link

You can see the section by going to my profile.

Please be honest, I know the car battery was my fault but this doesn’t seem fair to me. I feel completely alienated by my family and I just want validation that I’m not going crazy.