[UPDATE] Ran into AP 15 years later

It's been a few months since my last post, link here if interested: https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/comments/1nseflq/theres_8_billion_people_in_this_world_why/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

TL:DR My wife had a drunk ONS while we were engaged 15 years ago with an acquaintance we both knew. He knew full well we were engaged, months away from the wedding. I found out 10 years ago, after wedding and 2 kids. Successfully reconciled, had another kid and I haven't thought about him for 8 years. Relationship is great. Ran into him randomly at an event.

There were many comments that this couldn't be a coincidence. I can assure you 100% that's exactly what it was - just a cruel twist of fate. He was there on business, and I have since confirmed this. No need for comments saying this was planned, I know it wasn't, but don't want to go into how I know, you'll just have to take my word for it.

The problem I'm having, and could use some advice, is the guy is now living rent-free in my head, 15 years later! I haven't thought about this guy in years, and now he's back. Where I'm really really struggling, is the thought of revenge. This has never once occurred to me, ever. I'm a peace and love kind of guy.

I've moved on, I'm happy, I love my life. Yet after this, and I learned that he had recently married, I can't stop thinking, what if I just contacted his wife? Let her know what her husband did, all those years ago. The kind of guy he was? Just lob a little monkey wrench into his life? It probably wouldn't do anything major, but just having that little seed of doubt in her mind. Enough to cause him just a fraction of the pain I went through.......

I'm a smart guy, and I know that nothing good could come of this. There is no upside at all. Just move on, forget about it, live my life. But this just keeps occupying my thoughts.

Please help reinforce to me that this is a bad idea!