I cut off my ex best-friend because she is inconsiderate

let’s call her Jane. Me and Jane have been friends since we were 12. Jane has never shy away from being selfish or throwing me under the bus or just being self absorbed in her own world. I continued our friendship because I deeply cared for her and we have shared lots of meaning for moments. I am in a friendship group , Jane and her boyfriend Adam and Adam’s friends. Adam and his other friends, Daniel and Joseph are in the group, we are all close I guess. Over the years Daniel introduced his female friend Sara into the group, Sara was very problematic at the start, causing arguments then crying when she’s in the wrong or bosses everyone in the group around.

I’ve called her out for it several times, since everyone in the group have 0 spine whatsover and allow Sara to walk all over them. Sara and I do not get along and she’s developed this deep obsession and hatred towards me since she’s dating Daniel. Daniel behaviour has changed and allows Sara to walk all over him. Since then, Sara does not join any activities if I’m involved and I personally do not care or think of Sarah, she does not add value to my life but she always obsessively talk about me.

The group including my so called best friend would still hang out with Sara and Daniel. The justification is because he’s Adam’s best friend. Over the summer, Sarah and Daniel clashed with Jane and her boyfriend.

Since Sara decided to cause problems with Jane, Jane my supposed best friend revealed to me that she went on a holiday with Sara / Daniel/ Adam earlier this year. The holiday was chaotic and no one was happy, I felt hurt because they deliberately kept it hidden from me, personally I never complained when her and Sara/ Daniel hung out with them.

Now they have fallen out, the truth start coming out. So let’s go to the present day, Jane told me that Daniel’s sister wants to reconcile with Jane and Adam, they had a fall out over another situation that Sara ofc is the main dominator.

I wasn’t happy at all because after all that drama and you literally sat around someone who spoke badly about me each time you were in their presence and you didn’t defend me, now you want to be in that circle again? I asked Jane a simple question.

How would you feel if I did that, I genuinely just wanted to know her thought process and what made it okay? her response was Individualistic / dismissive and said she basically said she wouldn’t care it’s not her problem and she wouldn’t know because it’s never happened to HER! The audacity ?! Of course it has never happened to you because u know my loyalty lies and I act with good intention. I told her, someone who can sit with an enemy and listen to them slander you can kill you.

Thats when she sent me this response

“I think you keep wanting me to behave like you like it's an expectation bc that's what you would do. Honestly that's a major issue for our friendship. We're very different people, we react very different. I don't got any expectations from you, you are you and will react like you”

I simply didn’t open her message, soft blocked her everywhere, deleted her number and moved on with my life.

Now she’s stalking my social media every couple of days which is weird. I didn’t block her because I can’t be bothered she can keep watching from the distance because she’s never going to get access to me again, the respect was never there in the first place and I’m done.

Can I have some advice?

Posted Nov 28, 2025, 5:50 PM UTC

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