I dunno how to feel

Im not even sure if I used the right flair Ive never vented on Reddit before. I turned 18 today and I was allowed to go home cause I could not handle working today, my managers, they're really awesome, I really am lucky to work under their department. I know it's the thought that counts but I got a little gift bag from them and just, everything in it minus chocolate is all pink and girly stuff and I just- I know I should be grateful that they even got me a gift bag- I just..I can't help but cry, I really wanna have a good day and I just am having a horrible morning and I don't know how to feel or even what to say if they ask about it tomorrow..just wish it was easier to come out to people at work and stuff now that I officially can change my name and stuff..what a fun day, huh?