Filling the void

I should have been asleep by now, but there’s a feeling I can’t seem to let go of. I’m still trying to understand it, process it, and accept it. So I’ve been scrolling endlessly through different forums, partly because there’s a small comfort in knowing there are other people out there longing for the same things I do.

But at the same time, it’s a quiet reminder of everything I feel is missing in my own life. It started as just an a emotion, but I can see how it could evolve into doubt, self-doubt, and eventually damage whatever sense of self-worth one has.

What’s left of you when you no longer believe in yourself?

I’m still trying to understand these newly felt emotions and figure out how to navigate this period of my life. I know I don’t want to portray myself as a victim not to myself, and not to others.

Maybe the real question is whether I can learn to rely less on the world and people around me to fill this void, and instead start taking control of the situation I’m in myself?

After spending countless searching for relatable emotional connection online, I’ve realized something. Almost everyone I've met are longing for the exact same thing. Something to fill the growing emptiness inside us.

But instead of engaging and investing in the conversations right in front of us, we often enter them already expecting them to dry out. And as each conversation fades, it only enhances the very loneliness we’re trying so hard to escape. A down spiraling emotional roller-coaster.

Maybe. Deep down, I think I might know the way out of this situation. Finding peace within myself and beginning to work on and for, myself. Building my confidence and working on changing my perspective of myself. And maybe, as I do that, the loneliness will slowly begin to fade too, as I start rediscovering a love for myself.

❤️ Take care out there. Let's enjoy our time here together. While riding this emotional roller-coaster.