I think I'm finally done. I'm scared tho

Things have been more volatile lately, and I'm so over it all. I want him out my house, I have been paying for everything for years but now he has a good paying job and he's telling me everyday that he's leaving instead of helping me out the whole he caused. And at this point I'm okay with it all, I just want him to leave we can't speak without fighting, I'm on edge everyday I work nights so I have to leave him home with my kids. When we fight he threatens to physically hurt me, kill me, ruin my life, call the police and tell them shit about me. I have been scared to make him leave for years but I'm done, he can finally take care of himself and acts like he hates me, idk why he can't leave without punishing me. I can't hide how done I am and that scares me, that once he sees he has lost control he will hurt me or the kids. Idk what to do, I don't know how to act like everything is fine when it's so not okay.