It’s been one year of no contact with Nmom and I’m finally free

My birthday this year marked 1 year anniversary of going NC with my Nmom and enabling dad. I let them both know at the time that the only condition that I will talk to them again is if they go to therapy. I have been going to therapy and it helps me hold my boundary.

My birthday came, a few relatives reach out to me asking how I have been and it’s clearly under the influence of my mom. All of my extensive family lives super close and they might not be able to see how weird our family dynamic is. Except one of my cousins, who had also been living far away from our family. She reach out to me and wished me happy birthday, and told me how my mother has been talking shit the whole time we are NC. I told her I really don’t care what the rest of them think of me, she said good and then we started catching up on life.

My mother kept trying to establish contact with me and each time I just auto- respond go see a therapist or we will never talked again. She will then write long essay about how she’s not crazy and what will other people think of her if she goes to therapy. It’s nice to get the clarity that her priority is herself > other people > me and my sister. I’m now finally able to relieve myself of guilt and be at peace with how I left things with them.