Gonna sleep soon and simply dream my way to victory but imma keep it real…

…I think this is gonna be my last year.

When I started it was for the meme: well it’s not really funny anymore. Eventually I started to get serious I wanted to break my addiction: but if I wanted to do that, why just take a month? Why not get actual help?

This year also felt more depressing than past ones: not just with people failing posts but people announcing honorable discharges. Wow. Congrats. You got laid. Totally-not-envious social fuck up riding towards the end now to get the big nut yes, but with who? No one but my virgin self!

The challenge just doesn’t have the same appeal as it does before. I’m not some late teen college student anymore, I have a job that has begun to suck more, I’m getting behind on money I owe myself, I haven’t meet with any friends lately to hang out with, it keeps piling on and on.

This month was more stressful than just trying not to yank it. Life feels like it’s been kicking me this whole year and while this whole challenge can be about discipline, it was just one too many things keeping me aggravated.

I hate to sound negative and I am not gonna say this whole thing was stupid, there’s a reason I made it to diamond 4 (though tbh I think I should have failed one of those years) but life has changed for me and I can’t keep up with everything I did before. It was fun here and there, but I think this is it.

Still, ending on 5 isn’t too bad I think.