i cant take this anymore...

Ive been thinking abt suicide so much this year, fantazise about dying or ending myself and i cant take it anymore i've been through so muxh mental pain i could've gone insane but it got better until now. Now im dealing with physical pain stomach cramps for over 2 weeks and doctors saying its nothing even tho im dying my head is killing me, and if that wasnt enough my throats been sore and i got pus in my finger which hurts like hell and i know that the treatment will hurt even more.. i just cant do this anymore im never constantly happy im always either in pain, disappointing others or unmotivated for anything, i either overeat or undereat, i dont even have the power to go to my school anymore i just want this to end and never feel something again