Have been trying to wake up at 6am for a decade — just heard about DSPD

36M and I feel like my health has been declining steadily each of the past 10 years. I'm rambling and feeling a bit alone and lost! Looking for uplifting feedback and/or solidarity :)

My life choices / commitments have me waking up around 6am, 6 days / week. This has been the case for almost a decade though I used to take an extra sleep in 2 days / weeks or whenever I could sneak it in.

Shifting my schedule notably would mean abandoning my entire community and way of life — so I'm trying to get a sense of how much shifting / coping is possible. Is it worth, say, taking herbal slepe aids every night at 9pm for 2–4 weeks to see if I can become functional on a 10pm – 6am schedule or is this somethign that really doesnt' budge?

I've tried to force a 930/10pm bedtime but have never been able to stick to it for long. I also have Thalassemia minor, so I need a solid 9 hours on top of my natural waking being in the 8–10am range (varies seasonally). I understand that I'm likely to just feel increasingly exhausted and burnt out if I keep this up. I recharge with 10-12 hour sleeps on my day off, and going back to my normal schedule with 10 hr sleeps when I take vacation, but it's a losing battle on the health / energy front.

I had no idea DSPD was a "thing". My first memory of mornings being horrendous were in high school, when mom would wake me at 7am or 730am, and after getting changed after breakfast, I'd sit down and fall back asleep while she was in the car honking.

I skipped or avoided every morning class (before 1030am) through 7 years of university, and have had a few spurts where my work schedule was 10 or 11am to 6 or 7pm, where life felt... effortless? accessible? Anytime I have to be "on" at 9am or earlier it's a big practice to not hate my life — a TON of work figuring out the "perfect" breakfast/nutrition/caffeine flow to make me functional without crashing too much — and a ridiculous effort of will to not stare at screens with a drink and a bag of chips at 10/11pm when I should be going to be bed (And am genuinely exhausted, but also wired).

Occasionally I get to sleep in til 8am-ish and I honestly feel worse than when I force myself out of bed at 6am — the "internet" tells me that's even more indicative of delayed phase, even though it's a bit counter-intuitive.