FTM - Why do I wind up on here everytime i get high

Everytime without fail I get high and rub my clit to this subreddit. I always come a ton sometimes even when torturing my clit. I always have a simular fantasy of a guy tricking me into letting him torture my clit maybe in exchange for for something like gym training or something and then he slowly makes me his slave before taking my clit and either breeding me or making me anal only.... sometimes breeding me till my pussy is completely useless then using my ass. But it always revolves around my clit being tortured and taken.