At a loss after 10+ years of Lexapro

I am going to preface by saying I was oroginally on Lexapro for 9 years, started at 10mg and went to 20mg in 2022 due to my anxiety getting worse. I was exhausted all those years of taking it and attributed it to other things but finally in 2024, I went off Lexapro after 9 years. I was literally falling asleep at the wheel. No matter how good of sleep I got, every day I was exhausted and needing naps and falling asleep all the time. I started Sertraline for a few months, about 6 I’d say, starting last fall and going into this year. I did fine but it actually made my hair shed so badly. Yes, I have seen a dermatologist and my dermatologist and I are so close at this point he’s like “just text me if you need anything” cause I have literally seen him so much since 2021, as I experienced bad hair loss on and off for years…way before Sertraline. I ended up getting off Sertraline this year and stopped taking SSRI’s for a while and recently, about 2 mos ago, went back on Lexapro since 2024 but this time 5mg. I am EXHAUSTED again. I need naps all the time, I feel so low energy, I wake up, get 8+ hrs of sleep, and just like before, don’t feel reseted at all. My eyes have always had dark circles and they are getting way darker and worse. I’m gaining weight again and it’s only 5mg. I’m so upset…I thought 5mg would be ok and clearly not. I sleep all the time now like I used to and I can’t get into that cycles again but being off SSRI’s is so so hard for me. What do I do? I feel so lost and upset that it seems like SSRI’s are just not my friend anymore but without them I am so anxious and my OCD makes me so angry.