Relationship

Why do I struggle not to live in sin I try to focus on God and read His word daily but how can I say I have a relationship when I live in sin and can’t escape it I quit one thing for a few weeks then fall back into it a month if that makes sense how can I know I’m one of his elect when there’s verses like Romans 9 where God says He hardens peoples heart to let his wrath and glory be portrayed through them or 1 John 3 that says if you live in sin you don’t know Jesus Idk I’m scared I feel like im bound for hell and it’s scary