I want to leave her

I’ve dated this woman for 7 years.

I care about her as a friend, but nothing more. It started as long distance to fill my time, but we meet in person very often.

We’ve had our ups and downs, but through out time our downs just caused me to resent her more and more. Things that happened years ago no longer made me excited to hangout with her. It just kind of piled up, she’ll do something I don’t like, we’ll have a whole discussion over it; then she’ll continue to do it. I don’t want to say what specifically so I don’t tarnish her image to you ( the reader ), she has good intentions I just realised we’re not very compatible after all these years.

Sex with her feels like a chore. I don’t enjoy it. I’ve explained why hundreds of times and she just doesn’t change.

Everytime I try to talk to her about stuff she’ll spiral and have a huge anxiety breakdown and make it about her self. I just cannot be myself around her.

I realized all this months ago, and I’ve been forcing myself to talk to her everyday since, every conversation is forced. I just don’t want to do it anymore. I’m getting older. I want to find the person for me she’s obviously not it.

Is there a way to fix this? If not how do I breakup with her in a way that doesn’t break her? Me and her family talk, we game, but besides that we haven’t really integrated friends groups much.