Gay daddy 27M slapped me 23M

It was my 23rd birthday, and I was to spend the day with my girlfriend. When master texted me to come over and suck his cock, being the whore 1 am, I obliged.

When I went over, he ordered me to strip outside the door, and leave the clothes on the floor, I was really nervous to do so, but I was cock hungry too!

I crawled my way inside, and master made me beg like a puppy, to suck his cock. He took his leg and touched my cock and loomed disgusted. He started facefucking me, and spat on me every 2 mins or so. This went on for an hour, and finally He allowed me to cuddle with him, kissing him while I stroked his cock. While doing so he would tell me his r*pe fantasies, which got me a little scared, but at the same time hard.

Seeing that it got me hard got him disgusted, so he said "we need to clean you up" , and took me to the bathroom and started peeling on me. Ordering me to drink it too.

He then kicked me out, dripping in his pee, naked and humiliated. Once I was home he texted me "were gonna start feminising you, you're gonna have to start taking meds"

this scares me, because A. I've already shaved my body hair like he asked me to.

B. If I go this route, what happens to my life with mygirlfriend?

C.Am I in love with him ? Why do I let him treat me this way? And why do I like it