do cartilage piercings just not work for me?

i've pierced my ears dozens of times but any time i pierce my cartilage its abnormally painful, i've done it myself and had other people do it but every single time it gets infected and i'm in excruciating pain for the whole duration the piercing is in. also, i pierced my conch twice and both times i got scarily close to developing cauliflower ear. i don't know if this is normal but i definitely haven't seen it happen to others, which lead me to believe that i just don;t have the anatomy for cartilage piercings which is depressing because i really like how they look. then again its possible i somehow pierced them wrong every single time. i really dont know. i need advice!