am i bi or lesbian?

this is a question i've been asking myself since god knows when. i always thought (and still do) that i just have a preference for women and not for men. i usually only ever crush on women too, when i do, my feelings for them feel more intense than those for a man. i was in my first straight relationship a while ago and i didn't enjoy it? maybe it was because we kind of rushed into the relationship and the more i got to know him, the less i liked him. i also wasn't sexually attracted to him like that. he gave me the ick. i do still feel attracted to men (i think) but im not sure if i'll always feel this repulsed when i'm with a man. perhaps it's just this experience that icked me out. idk. right now i know for sure that i don't want be with a man for a long time.