is it wrong to cheat on a abusive partner?

I’m a 25 yr old female

I’ve been in an abusive relationship these last 3 and half years. the first two years I endured abuse in every form. mental, physical, emotional.

I have a previous drug addiction. when we met, I gave up drugs cold turkey. despite this, he would call me awful names like a drug addict, junkie, meth head, and etc. all while I was sober for the first two years. he would tell me use drugs while I was sober for the first two years we were together. I caved after 2 yrs, and relapsed.

I have been hurt so badly by this man. strangled on maybe 6 occasions, slapped, backhanded, had my face beat in, kicked, and spat in my face so many times. he also loves to me how I’m worthless, retarded, and nothing but a junkie…hundreds of times I have been told this.

I admit, after two years of abuse, I cheated. however, when we first moved into our apartment and I kicked him out due to him calling me names and being abusive, I kicked him about and every time we argued he said he cheated on me. every time. It was hard to discern whether or not he cheated on me because he took it back every time. but the night after he backhanded me and left me with a two black eyes, I cheated. I tried to remain sober but he hurt me so bad. I became pregnant last year and I decided to keep it.

this was a hard decision to make. I didn’t have the money to afford an abortion due to my unemployment.

I feel bad for resorting to cheating but I told him so many times I didn’t want to be with him for how he treated me. he would apologize, and go back to abusing me like nothing ever happened.

he found something on my phone that eluded to me cheating. he surprisingly didn’t hurt me but acted hurt. but what he doesn’t realize how much hell and misery he put me through.

he acts like he still wants to be with me, after invading my privacy, but I don’t. he doesn’t give me a option to distance myself from him.

I’m tired of living in misery. am I wrong for cheating despite the fact that he told me so many times that he cheated me on me when I was utterly faithful to him?