I'm not gay anymore...

Hey everyone. I’m too lazy to write a whole novel, but I really needed to talk about this, so here’s the short version.

I realized I was gay this summer. I’m 18, I live in France, and I just started college, so I figured it was a good time to explore my sexuality. I tried apps like Grindr, and honestly… it just made me feel sick of the whole thing. I expected some weird interactions, but the amount of people acting insufferable or disrespectful really surprised me. Maybe it’s just the guys here, I don’t know.

For context: I’m a virgin, never had my first kiss, never dated, never had sex. I also have body-image issues, so it’s hard for me to send pics or put myself out there, which probably explains why I haven’t had any dates yet. I just wanted to experience sex like any normal person — nothing wild — but now I’m already exhausted by the whole “being gay” experience lol.

I’m wondering if anyone else went through a phase like this? Feeling fed up with the community or the apps before even getting started?

Anyway, for now I will fantasizing about the hot twitter scenarios like bromance, fraternity stuff I wish could actually happen in real life. 😔😔😔