hate

i hate this fucking face. i hate it. i cant stand it. im so disgustingly ugly it makes me wanna cry. i think i deserve this, i wouldn't have it otherwise probably. i just really hate it. i wish i looked normal, i wish i was lovable or likable or something. im fucking nothing. im so disgusting i hate it i hate everything. i hate my brain i hate my body i hate it. im so annoying but i cant learn to shut up and i just continue and continue and continue i think i should just kill myself at this point. i cant stand anything anymore i really cant. i want to slit my wrist open i want to hang myself but im too scared to do anything as always. its not like blade's not next to me but im waiting for it to pass i guess. i just need to do something. i might just starve myself again, maybe for a week. i cant anymore i really cant. i hate everything so much i hate this i hate myself im so numb yet so angry yet so sad and its a over the place. my brain's yelling at me and im just stuck there like a fucking lemon. im so tired. im so annoying im so stupid im so disgusting. i should kill myself i really should i don't deserve anything. im so sick of everything. im sick of it all im fucking done. i deserve this i really do i should just get on with it and do everyone a favor. i hate this. ill never be loved or anything and im just gonna rot alone on a sidewalk for the rest of my life. i really need to soon. my birthday's coming up, maybe then. that'll be my gift to them. im such a fucking burden all the time i just need to kill myself. i hate this. i just wanna be normal.