I feel like I've been ruining my own experience, seeking advice?

I started sema about 9 weeks ago and I was so excited. The first two injections worked amazingly (right at the time of my period) - and I wasn't craving anything even alcohol (I lowkey am an alcoholic) but it started to go downhill after that.

It felt like the effects were wearing off a lot faster (especially when off my period), so I increased to .5 the next month and same thing happened where it would hit the hardest the first 48 hours and then resume back to normal the following day. My alcohol and food cravings came back stronger than ever and I relapsed. I felt ravenous and and only wanted to eat junk food like chips, sweets, and liq.

Idk what my thought process was behind this maybe I was just panicking because of the binging sprees but I decided to take my shots inconsistently and not on schedule at all, just whenever I felt like I "needed it." I am reluctant to put myself back on a designated day because what I'm doing doesn't seem harmful, I do make myself wait 72 hours to do it again but I have thoughts about taking it in less time because of the anxiety. I haven't weighed myself at all since week 3 because I know I've gained and I'm scared to see how much I have gained.

I am now about to start 1mg and I am wondering if there is any way I can still make this work or should I just quit wasting my money now. I know I crashed hard and my diet became horrible but I am willing to start taking protein and water intake a lot more seriously and quitting alcohol for real. Would tirz be a better alternative for me? I think I just need a bit of support and probably feel lonely and anxious because I've been keeping this whole thing a secret from everybody.

TLDR; was excited and ready to use sema, but then fell off on the "correct way" to be on it by panicking, binging, drinking, injecting too early. wanna know if i should just stop now or switch to something easier symptom-wise