Saw a comment and it made me think …

A comment I read yesterday made me rethink why I want sex so much. It’s not about orgasm. It’s about feeling sexually desired, turning someone on, giving pleasure, and feeling deep emotional intimacy. Only the last one can happen without sex, and even then it doesn’t feel the same for me.

Non-sexual closeness like cuddling or deep talks is wonderful, but it’s a different type of connection. It doesn’t replace the feeling I get when my partner responds to me sexually. For me, sexual intimacy is the deepest form of connection I’ve ever felt, and it’s what separates romance from friendship.

I often see advice suggesting non-sexual bonding instead of sex, but that doesn’t satisfy me when the craving is specifically sexual. I don’t want cuddling to feel like a lesser substitute, I just want it recognized as a different kind of closeness.

For context, my husband hasn’t touched me sexually in over five years and hasn’t received sexual pleasure from me in about seven. That shapes how I feel. I’ve always had emotional and intellectual connection in my life, but not much sexual attention, so that’s what I miss most.

I hope this explains where I’m coming from.