Borscht

I understand why you did what you did. I am devastated, regardless. Poof, gone. Gutted. I feel like I can’t breathe. Hopefully time will make it hurt less. But here I am with this account hoping you at least see this because if I would have known this was what you were planning to do I would have told you all the things I’ve carried in my chest for a long time—quiet truths that never found a place in the world we lived in. One of them is this: what I felt with you was real, deeper than anything I expected, and far more powerful than anything I was prepared for. From the beginning, our connection didn’t feel like something I had to reach for; it was simply there—steady, undeniable, and alive. You understood parts of me I didn’t know were visible. Conversations with you felt like stepping into warm light, and even the silences between us felt full, like they were saying everything we were afraid to. But loving someone who isn’t mine to keep has its own kind of ache. I learned to hold my feelings the way one holds a fragile, beautiful thing—carefully, quietly, without asking for more than the world would allow. I never wanted to complicate your life, or mine; I only wanted to honor the truth of what existed between us. Still, there are moments that linger: the ease of our laughter, the strange sense of home I felt with you. Those moments carved a place in me that I don’t think time will erase. They were brief, maybe, but they were real—and they changed me. I don’t regret caring for you. I don’t regret the connection we shared, even if it wasn’t meant to last or to become something larger. Some people come into your life and remind you what it feels like to be seen. You were one of those people for me. If life had been different, maybe we would’ve had a chance to see where this could go. But life is what it is, and love—at least the kind I felt for you—doesn’t demand possession. It just exists, quietly, faithfully, even as paths diverge. So this letter isn’t a plea or a confession. It’s a thank-you. Thank you for the spark, the softness, the depth. Thank you for being someone I could love, even if you weren’t mine to keep. Some connections don’t fade. Ours is one of them. The universe is so cruel sometimes.