how long until I can confidentially give up? (mtf)

started mtf hrt at 14, Im about to be 19 so 5 years of hormones on my back. I seriously look like a ultra discord mod without the neck beard

I think Im just not built for this, I see people who started transition in their 20s or 30s and they completely pass to the untrained eye in 2 years or smth, my only goal is to pass as a pretty woman by cis standards, Im aware that some people are happy with themselves even tho they don’t pass but Im not this kind of person

I simply can’t handle living in this sunk cost fallacy for longer. I cry to myself whenever I see successful transitions and its just destroying me from the inside to force myself to belive that I have a chance.

sure there are certain angles where I can pass with makeup on pictures. but people who see me irl don’t see a cropped photo of my face, they see how I look with my resting face and my deformed body

idk man