How would you handle this?

What would you do?

I just received a call from my son’s school. He is 9 - (ODD, OCD, Conduct Disorder, ADHD, and high-function autism).

Anyway, he is significantly behind his peers as he has no interest in learning and he is verbally aggressive against those who try to help him.

Today the school called and I found out this is the second day in a row he has told an aide “shut your (b word) (a word) up” and called her a big back.

This type of behavior is unacceptable and inexcusable. We do not allow this type of language or behavior at home — yet when he goes to school he thinks he can do it there. We get reports back almost daily from his main teacher about back and forth arguments with classmates that also include cussing.

We talk and talk and talk to him. We plead with him. We explain things repeatedly. What else can I do? I was a single mom his first 5 years and the last 4 years have been me and my boyfriend who I also had 2 more children with. He takes two different medications to help with his ADHD and his compulsive outbursts. We’ve switched medication around a bunch, increasing dosages — and nothing. A few years back he used to do outside of school therapy and in-school therapy and he hated it. I feel like alot of these actions are him trying to be cool in front of his peers, but he is also lacking the understanding that these actions have consequences.. and more importantly they hurt people. I’m afraid of the path he’s on.

He’s going to be home from school soon and I need to talk to him about this — I’m so disappointed.