I want my girl to get fucked by other men

So me and this girl have been in a talking stage for a few months now and everythings working great. And then idk when or how it even started but i imagined her getting fucked by other dudes while looking me in the eyes and i got really hard if im honest. I just cant get it out of my head and i dont know if im a cuck or what to do. Im definitely not gonna tell her tho… If anyones wondering about us: were both 18 years old, white, from europe, and were both virgins. Im not even sure who i wanna reach out to with this post but dms are open