I never felt so ugly and lazy…

Hello. 10 weeks with twins and I don’t know how to not be the laziest bum in the world. I can barely get out the bed. I haven’t done laundry since Halloween. I haven’t done any skin care. My house is a complete mess.my hair is unkept. When I do have the energy to get up to eat I’m eating from my bed. I feel like I just bed rot 24/7. I feel so dingy and so bummy. I hate my boyfriend most of the days I legit can’t stand him. I just feel like all around horrible person. Not really seeking advice just venting hoping I’m not the only one. I feel so mean and ugly. I also have a 12 year old who’s actually been so helpful and I pray she doesn’t feel neglected by my bed rotting. :( hopefully second trimester gets better for me.