I still kinda miss her

Basically I had an online relationship with this girl I guess for a week or so but I fucked it up and now I guess it's been at least 5 years not a single month goes by where I don't search for her username or anything and I think I'm still blocked I never really recoverd afterall her she was my first idk girl I talked with and after that I don't really talk to girls for relationship strictly for work related nothing now I'm in my twenties and I don't have a single female friend nor any real interaction ik it's all my fault 💀 and idk what I should do like I wanna move on