Why do they say we have to build trust after infidelity?

I don’t understand this logic. Trusting is what got us here in the first place. Why would I want to put myself in that vulnerable place again with the same person. I know some will say then don’t reconcile. But to me, reconciling or not, insanity is STILL doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. My lesson in all of this is, don’t trust anyone, especially those closest to you. And never be so sure about anything. A lesson hard learned.

A friend of ours, back when my WH first started cheating, who knew about his cheating, said to me, “don’t ever be so sure about what you think you know” I never forgot that. But I dismissed him because he was a know-it-all type “macho man” and I always felt like he and I butt heads because of that. But not in a terrible way.

But now I know exactly why he said that. He was warning me, for whatever reason. He was also cheating on his wife. But my WH was the ringleader because it boosted his ego. Yes, “my angel, sweet, attentive” husband.