A word you need to learn for closure: indignant

After a "discard", you feel shocked, sad, angry, confused, disbelief - it's a jarring event. If they faded away, then this may not apply to you as much, but if they took the nuclear option and you watched someone meltdown in front of you, this is a word you will want to know.

indignant: feeling or showing anger because of something unjust or unworthy

This comes from Latin indignus, meaning unworthy or undeserved. Yes, we all know, or at least we are told, what they did wasn't personal. They were "overwhelmed", they were "flooded", "dysregulated" - fine. Does that justify what they did? Absolutely f-cking not.

We are adults (most of us) - we learned long ago as children, or in therapy, that emotional control is expected between two humans interacting. It is the bare-minimum. So when their monkey brain takes control and starts flinging poo at you? Block them.

Monkeys who are physically trapped in zoos are justified in flinging poo. Grown adults who fling emotional poo are not monkeys trapped in zoos. They are CHILDREN in adult bodies.

You are not angry after the discard. You are INDIGNANT. What they did had no moral basis, there is no justification for their actions. Do not believe that there is any reality where any adult hurling poo at you is acceptable.

The closure was the disrespect. The invalidation of your feelings, the gaslighting, the narrative re-writing, the blame-shifting, the shame-dumping, the refusal to take ANY accountability, the bridge-burning, the complete loss of control, the refusals to come to the table & talk like an adult after hundreds, thousands of invitations to do so - these are the elements that make up your closure.

The indignancy that you feel is JUSTIFIED. It is VALID. It restores self-respect and allows you to build BOUNDARIES. Let it burn away any attachment to whoever "discarded" you. This is how you "move on". They did not "discard" you, they showed where their limit was & how they react when its met, and it is pathetic & below you. You deserve better, your body is telling you that, and now it is up to you to hold yourself to that.