I found out the girl I’ve been "talking" to in Uni has had a boyfriend for 6+ months. She used me as an emotional fluffer, ditched me in public, then treated me like an emotionless npc.

I need to get this shit off my chest because my head is about to explode. been thinking about this whole situation non stop. I'm going to explain the entire situation in details so its going to be very very long bear with me.

met this girl (i heard rumours that she has a BF) in the same lecture as me in uni. She approached me first. before the lecture began she came up to me and was like "yo what is this car page u got?" (keep in mind i only spoke to her like once or twice during the lecture about some things we took) so naturally "i was like what? how do u know?" then the lecture began and i dropped the discussion for later on. then after the lecture finished i went up to her again and started talking about my car page, the edits i do, my photography, she even showed me what type of cars she liked, We hit it off instantly. She played the role perfectly shy, sweet, cute "I’m not like other girls." She told me I was her type because I’m a "shy, weird guy" and she hates the loud, obnoxious dudes in general. note: (i am socially awkward with women).

we had deep talks. I’m talking about our future, her dreams of living on a farm with chickens and cows and being a mom, anxiety, fears of being too kind and getting deceived, some personal issues, everything. She even told me, "Take me with you on your next photoshoot", "Let's enter the robotics contest together.", "lets build a go kart together" "i should teach u this language i know", "i want u to write something on this notebook i have that i make people write things on". we exchanged videos of our rooms and hobbies and all the cool shit we had lying around most notably a "Hotwheels" car in which she really liked and was like "give me this one now" so i was like i should definitely bring it to her as a gift or surprise, and i did ( more on that later).

now during that period i notice that she doesn't really reply or react to all my messages. she maybe the type of person that does that with everyone but me personally i reply to every single thing she says or sends, for example i send like 6 reels some texts and whatnot, the majority of times she just likes message even though the things i send are things she seems actually interested in. so i was like okay maybe she is the type of person to just like messages. also i notice that her response times are very long (6+ hours) so again i also went like okay maybe she is busy with other things in her life. now during this period i completely lost my appetite, stressing over every move she makes, analysing every word she says, just constantly being on edge waiting for her to text or send something. I was just so invested in this whole thing i genuinely liked her i really did.

so i found out that in certain days we finish lectures at the same time so i was like "hey do u mind dropping me off at this spot which is in ur way?" so she was like okay sure no problem. so the day comes where we finish together so i hit her up "hey where are u?" she replied with a pic of her studying and was like "sorry I'm gonna stay late today i have a midterm after 3 days" so i was like "aw man, it was never really about the drop off, i just wanted to socialize". i guess i was implying that I'm interested in her and wanted to get to know her more.

so one saturday a week after all of this talking i hit her up again saying "I'm done with lectures where are u?" she left me on delivered for 4 hours then proceeds to reply telling me that she's sitting with 2 guys to "study" but these 2 guys weren't studying for shit and she was feeling uncomfortable and wants to leave but she cant. so i kept telling her "do u want me to come?" "should i come get u?" she kept telling me "wait wait let me think" (keep in mind i was almost outside uni) then after a couple of minutes i told her "fuck u I'm coming" and went all the way back inside for her. right before i reached her she told me "I'm out I'm out" meaning she managed to leave exactly when i arrived. so we walked together for a bit and she was venting to me about everything that has happened then we went ahead and sat somewhere and proceeded to vent even more for about half an hour so i was like that's the perfect time for me to give her the "Hotwheels" car she liked, and so i did. she really really liked it she was like "u didn't have to do that that's so sweet, I'm going to give u something in return" so i was like " no no u don't have to" but she insisted so i said "okay sure". then after all that i walked her to her class and left.

i was being a good listener i comforted her i assured her or at least i tried my best to, then later that day she posted the car i gave on her story and she told me that she showed my car page to like 5 different people and showed them my edits and stuff and told me that she felt like a proud mom. then after what happened that day i texted her like "hey it just crossed my mind that ur too shy to say no to people, and when i asked u if u could drop me off on ur way when leaving uni i felt that that might make u uncomfortable or something" then she replied with "if u made me uncomfortable i wouldn't be still talking to u" so in my mind i was like okay good I'm not like any other guy to her.

then the next day we were sending each other reels and shit, and in relation to one reel she sent she started telling me "i don't want to grow up" "how am i gonna have kids and raise them right" "how am i going to let them go when they grow up and get married and move away from me" "how am i gonna pick my husband, how is he going to find me" "omg too many responsibilities when growing up i don't want to grow up" so i did comfort her again and told her to take it easy and its all going to be alright and ur worrying too much ur overthinking it. and she did eventually after some more talking.

so the day after that i was on my way to uni and as i was arriving i coincidentally saw her from afar so i went up to her and we talked for like an hour about a bunch of things nothing in particular and then it was time for her lecture (i had no lecture at the time) so i said "i have no lectures at the moment, would it be fine if i attended ur lecture as a guest?" and she went "yea sure lol" so we went in and i sat next to her and saw a couple of my friends that are in the same lecture, but during the whole thing i felt like she was just so tense and uncomfortable with me being there, so after the lecture was over i told her "did my presence make u feel uncomfortable?" she answered me an unsure "yea no it was alright", then i started talking with the people i knew from that lecture, and then she just left without saying bye or anything. so at that time i was like okay yea that might have been a bad move by me. so as i was walking out with my friends i saw her walking with another guy (the alleged bf) she was all smiling and laughing then she saw me but didn't react. so naturally i thought okay maybe the rumours i heard are indeed real.

So about an hour passes after i saw her with that guy and she saw me walking, she sends me a text saying "🙂" then 2 separate texts bellow that only contain my name (as if she is poking me) so I reply with "what's up", she leaves me on seen. Theni send "?", again leaving me on seen. So I text one last time saying "so Ur just gonna leave me on seen like that?" in which she proceeds to leave on delivered too. Then 3 hours after that she calls me, I purposely didn't answer then left it for about 30 minutes because i didn't feel good about the way that whole interaction ended. so after 30 minutes passed I texted her saying "yo missed the call and I can't talk rn. Everything good?" she then replied instantly saying "why where are u" "I wanted to say I didn't mean to leave u like that after the lecture ended" "I was outside on my phone waiting for u to finish talking with Ur friends" "I saw someone I know, he had something important to tell me" (the alleged BF) then she started telling me what that guy told her which was an incident that happened last week, she said "remember when I asked the guys in our lecture to drop me off at my car" "they told everybody they know that I got in the car with them" "and another guy I've been teaching for 2 days told everybody that I like him" then she went on explaining to me about how she regrets asking them for a ride and that she doesn't even like any of these guys and how immature and disrespectful they are and so on and so forth. So as usual I yet again reassure her calm her down telling her that it's okay I know what Ur intentions were so just ignore these losers pretend like they don't exist and don't stress over what they say that's how they win. Then she was like "it doesn't matter what my intentions are" "I don't want anyone that talks to me think I'm they're friend" then I said "no it does matter what Ur intentions are, it matters to me at least." then she saw that message and just left.

So the next day was the day we both have the same lecture in addition to the same guys that she had the incident with, I arrived there early hoping to find her there and there she was, we talked for a bit then the lecture started and we had to work in pairs so she was like I don't want to work with those people let's pair up together so we did. We worked together had fun and all then when the lecture finished and we were walking out, guess who shows up in our face. The alleged BF. He came up to us, didn't acknowledge me or say hi or anything, he just went straight to her, she started showing him all the work we done in the lecture. Then she asked me (in front of that guy) like "hey do u want me to drop u off at the place u want?" i looked at her then looked at him then looked back at her and said "I mean yea sure if u don't mind" then that guy gave me a "look" and he told her "come here for a bit I want to tell u something" so she was like "wait here a bit I'll be back" so I waited. And as I was waiting what was going through my mind was oh yea they definitely have a thing going on (3 weeks after our first interaction). After waiting for like 5 minutes I see them both walking out of some place and thought okay she is going to come to me and be like yea sorry I can't give u a ride today either (the outcome I was preparing for the entire time). But no. She didn't come up to me. She didn't look at me. They just walked right past me (about 10 feet away). Then that guy as they're walking away, slightly turned my direction and gave me another "look". A minute goes by then she calls me (I didn't notice) then she sent me a message saying "why aren't u answering" "I'm going to stay in uni for a bit longer" "this guy wants me to do something with him". All I replied was "mmm okay"

so at this point I was genuinely confused about this whole situation. She left me bewildered and disappointed. Like I literally had no idea what she was getting at with me. Then after an hour or so she sent me pics and vids she took of us during the lecture, then after that a text saying "I just got home, driving in the rain is such a vibe" (it was raining). So I opened these messages the next day and just hit her with "like message" no more no less. Then day after day I was like surely she'll apologize to me for what has happened or attempt to explain what was going on or just say something. But also no. For an entire week she didn't. She didn't say anything she didn't send anything she didn't call. Nothing. I was just so shocked for what she did. After everything we talked about everything that has happened, this is what I get?

Then a week after that happened, the time for that lecture comes again. I arrived exactly on time, didn't bother looking for her, didn't save her a seat, and just sat down and pretended like she wasn't there. The teacher gave us a break mid lecture so I stayed seated in the lecture hall and so did she. I just sat on my phone watching reels while she was also on her phone googling something. After like 5 minutes she rolled her chair to me and said chuckling "why are u quiet?" I answered with a shrugging "idk" (she didn't even bother to say hey or hello or how are u or what's up). then she went on looking around the class room, and started asking me questions about the things we just took before the teacher gave us a break

I couldn't help but answering her. (I regret not leaving the room in the first place) then after a couple questions, I couldn't take it anymore so I just left the room and went to do something else until the teacher came back. And after I returned to the lecture which had already begun, she didn't speak a single word with me for the entire day. Nothing at all. I purposely tried to avoid her as much as I could and it seemed to have worked. Then the lecture finished, and I just grabbed my stuff and left straight away. I lowkey expected her to call me out or try to look for me, but yet again she didn't. Like bro. What the fuck was all of that about. Was anything we ever talked about genuine? Was she acting the entire time? Why did she never mention the fact that she is with another dude for months before me? What was the whole point of this thing I legit am so confused and just shocked.