How Can My Family Visit Hawaiʻi Respectfully?

I’ve been reading about Hawaiʻi’s history and the overthrow to better understand why many locals and Native Hawaiians have strong feelings about tourism and outside influence. I also grew up in San Diego, so I have some sense of what it’s like to live in a place where tourism drives the economy but also prices out the people who call it home.

With that in mind, my family and I are planning a visit about a year from now. I’ll be bringing my two daughters (5 and 10), and my goal isn’t to just “see the sights,” but to give them a meaningful experience and help them appreciate Hawaiian culture and the people who live there.

Rather than asking the usual “What are the must-see things?”, I’d like to ask it this way:

If you had guests you actually wanted to come — guests you feel would respect the place and the people — what would you want them to see, learn, or experience to help them understand Hawaiʻi beyond the tourist version?

Any guidance on places, practices, etiquette, or cultural experiences that you feel are appropriate for visitors would be greatly appreciated.

Mahalo for any help.