Dysphoria is so much harder to deal with since acknowledging that it's real

So my egg cracked in August. Before that, I can remember signs of gender dysphoria is far back as the start of puberty - I distinctly remember stealing my mom's razor and shaving off all my body hair as soon as I noticed its existence at like age 13. But while I remember hating my body hair, hating my voice changes, hating any reminders of the annoying thing between my legs, and so forth, it was never an ordeal to get over it and go on with my day. Sure, it got worse in the last year or so, but it hadn't been bad until the last few months.

I just got out of the shower. I haven't found time to shave my whole body for about 2 weeks, because of fall finals and ADHD. My hands and arms, I've kept up with, but I've got 2 weeks of hair on my chest, and it borderline made me feel physically sick to look at, and that upsets me so much because it didn't used to be such a huge problem.

I hate this. I hate that I've become so sensitive to things that used to only bother me a little, and I could brush them off. I don't know what to do about it. I've been on hrt for a month but it's so slow to make changes. And there's so much bad news lately about politicians attacking our rights that I'm terrified for whether I'm even going to have that in the long run.

I don't even know where I'm going with this, I just wanted to vent.