I don’t know if spirit has substack….but I miss you twinnem ❤️. I think of you often. I look for you everywhere. 

This is my brother in law Michael. He wasn’t just my brother in law but also my best friend. He passed over the summer and ever since then life has been bordering on impossible. I’ve hit rock bottom so many times I’m starting to think the universe just keeps redefining the bottom just for me. 

He was the funniest and sweetest person anyone could ever know. He’d give you the shirt off his back just to make you smile. I tried my best to be present everyday before he passed but I couldn’t do it in person. I couldn’t be next to him in the end, I had to say goodbye on FaceTime and I feel like I didn’t say enough. Lately I’ve been thinking of him more, which I didn’t think was possible. My ear (right) has always rung but since he passed it’s been louder. I tell myself it’s him chatting my ear off on the other side, he was a talker. I put more plates on the altar for him, I put wine on the altar for him, tequila, baked goods, and water everyday. I miss you Mikey I really fucking do. 

I apologize for posting this randomly here but for some reason these last few days the grief has been much more visceral and palpable. I feel like I can feel him. I walk into rooms and it feels like I have a different perspective of the space as if someone else is looking at the room through my eyes. I don’t know what I’m looking for posting here but I hope it resonates with someone. 

I don’t know if spirit can read the letters I wrote to you. But boy do I hope so