Let this guide you.

I‘ve come across so many people with so many questions lately and it made me wonder if you may have similar questions. I never want to leave you confused on where I stand. Even if I were being played for a fool, even if I don’t mean anywhere near as much to you as I think I do, I know how I feel and I don’t want there to be any questions about it.

I’d catch you. On your worst days when you can’t make it out of bed, when you’re giving me hell over the silliest things, when every little thing I do annoys the crap out of you, I’d stay. When you’re pissed off and you‘re pissing me off and I don’t have anything nice to say to you, I’d sit there and argue with you until the problems resolve. I want to hear you, I want to find common ground, and I want to fix things. It’s never me against you. It’s always us against this problem, and I want to make a concerted effort to hit the issues head on.

I would never hide you. I have been showing you off even before we got this far in, so stop yourself now if you think for a second that I wouldn’t be proud to call you mine. I’d tell you everything, listen to everything you have to tell, and I’d believe and trust you. There is nothing you can’t say that I haven’t already dreamed up and thoroughly considered to be true, and I have lived through it. I’m not opposed to long winded messages spilling your guts or random phone calls of a similar fashion. I’m not opposed to vulnerability or corny, mushy sentiments. In fact, I welcome it all wholeheartedly. Be the you that feels like they're doing way too much, it’s not too much, I want it. Watch it be reciprocated with ease.

I was not looking for this when we met. I tried very hard to chalk it up to me just being in a bad spot back then. But here I am, years later, and I still have not gotten over you. I chose you then, I choose you now, and all you have to do is try for me. Be straight up and tell me what you want, what you need, what you dream about and I will do my part to make it our reality. I am incapable of wanting anyone else anymore.

So from here on out I want you to keep this in mind when you feel you need reassurance, if you’re feeling lost or confused or overwhelmed, or if you just want a reminder that someone out there feels for you how I feel and is willing to put in the work and stay. I never needed it to be a shared feeling and I never needed beautiful words or entire villages singing to me for me to feel the way I do. I just do, I have for forever now, and as much as I try and fight it, it won’t go away. I miss you, I want you, it’s obvious.

Hope this helps. Have a good weekend!