Parentification of Rory

I see a lot of people get upset about who Rory becomes and even watching the show back, a lot of people don’t like Rory. And I just want to give a different POV.

I’m watching S1:E7. The episode starts out with Rory and Lorelai discussing laundry, because they’re short on underwear (why are we talking about a HSer’s underwear?!). Lorelai jokingly guilt trips Rory about not doing laundry for her too, and Rory eventually offers to do another load. (I will note here that I started doing my own laundry at a young age so I don’t think it’s wrong that Rory‘s doing her own laundry. It’s the point that laundry technically is an adult function and Lorelai forgot to do their laundry, resulting in Rory having to do a load.)

Later in the episode Lorelai invites Dean to their house for movie night and Rory freaks out. Lorelai asks would she would be freaking out if it was Lane who invited Dean, and Rory remind/ her that Lane is her friend and Lorelei is her mom.

Then at movie night, Lorelai leaves Rory and Dean alone, and tells Rory she’s trying to be her girlfriend and again Rory tells her that she needs her to be her mom.

When Rory goes to the bathroom, Lorelai then has the talk with Dean, and warns him not to hurt her daughter.

We often don’t realize that Rory has been parentified and Rory is growing up in a somewhat chaotic household. Also resulting in Rory being really mature and liking order. Part of the reason we don’t notice it is because Lorelai is 1) (for the most part) likeable and 2) she then has these moments where she is a great parent. So we ignore the chaos.

Parentified children become highly functioning adults or return to childlike immaturity. Rory spent her childhood meticulously planning, and being mature - the only thing she could ensure was not chaotic. And when that plan fell apart, she completely fell apart too and just could never get back to her true form.

I do understand there’s other things that are annoying about her. But I do think that as viewers we overlook this major formative part.

Signed, The parentified child that being a highly function Type-A adult