relationship advice im so confused

Okay so bit of context. me (22f) and my partner (22m) have been together for pretty much 3 years. We have a normal relationship i’d say. we have have our ups and downs as any other couple. He started a new job in Sept that pays very well and goes hand in hand with the degree he will have in May. ( before this job he wasn’t really working that much and had another job that was pretty much weekends only at a bar and it paid ok but he really enjoys his coworkers and the company.) anyways since starting this new job which is full time, and still has that bar job. While being in the hardest semester of his college career on top of it. I noticed as time went on he was becoming less happy. He stopped doing a lot of the things he loved and enjoyed. (which i would bring up and encourage him to make time to do those things.) He stopped cooking for himself, would only eat out or eat gas station food. and would smoke joints multiple times throughout the day. (he’s always smoked but it would be a bong rip and not throughout the whole day. and he also used to cook a lot.)

Another thing to mention is he does not have a car. But i do. And i would let him use my car to go to work since his new high paying job was 30 minutes away and my job is 5 minutes and my school is 10 so i can easily walk to work i didnt mind because i did it before he started to use my car. and he would uber me to and from school when i had class. anyways like I said I had noticed he was increasingly getting more sad and depressed. I try to support him and encourage him , i already help him alot by letting him use my car.

The other day he sent me a text saying can we talk after work…… my heart was in my ass. ( More context the day prior to the text we kinda got into a little because he was stressed about financial stuff. And I was kinda just like well you eat out for every meal, that’s gonna add up, you also smoke a lot which adds up and so on.) I could tell he was not ok leaving that conversation. I had a weird feeling… so on to him texting me asking to talk. I had a 20% feeling he was gonna break up with me and an 80% feeling he was gonna talk to me about what’s going on and communicate his thoughts and feelings and create a plan for growth.

So here is why I am incredibly confused. I’m gonna try to long story short what he said -

I’m at a point in my life where I don’t know how to be independent and love myself. I need to learn on my own how to love myself so I can give you the love you deserve. I need to learn how to pick myself up and not rely on on my parents or you to help pick me up. I love you and this has absolutely nothing to do with you, you’re an amazing girlfriend and wonderful woman. I don’t love myself and I don’t know how to be independent and what i want in life. But i need to be alone to learn how to do these things and become the man I envision for myself and our future. I don’t want to breakup completely or end this love story forever but i need to be alone and i don’t know for how long. This doesn’t mean sit by the phone and wait for me to call next week or try to change my mind. I need to do this for me and for the future i want. All that being said If it is right and i hope it is and we find our way back to each other. I’m sorry this is not fair to you for putting you in this position but i’d rather this then to drag it out to an unrecoverable point. I don’t want you to hate me.

EVERY question i asked was answered with “i don’t know”… he kept saying this is a break not a break up but wont give me a time frame or anything. so it feels more like a break up…. but i just don’t understand. Why am I being punished and shunned for being a good girlfriend and helping out my man? Is this a mental breakdown and him making irrational decisions that he doesn’t even understand? I am just so confused. I don’t think that it’s he doesn’t love me anymore because prior to this everything had been normal and he gave me love and affection like he always had. I just don’t know what to make of it and it’s been 2 days and we haven’t really spoken since. What do I make of this??? We will speak and see eachother at some point because I have so much of his stuff and he has stuff of mine as well. So now that i’ve processed what i know and he has had time to himself we are gonna have a conversation.

Ps. Please don’t talk about my grammar and punctuation lol… I can’t be bothered right now