Lying to my parents for my peace of mind

Problem/Goal:

Hello!!! I just need to get this off my chest in hopes to get validation that what I’m feeling is okay.

I’ve been lying to my parents/family for few months now. I just recently rented a condo (the very first time I moved out) and my boyfriend (31) and I (28) are staying there ever since.

Context: His family knows and they are not as nosy as my family (especially my mom) are. They don’t ask questions. They are okay with it. We are both the youngest in the family. All of our siblings are already married and have own families. I guess his family is okay with it or they don’t mind at all because we’re already adults and professionals and have our own source of income.

I only get bothered whenever I go home on weekends and my mom would always ask me “Pumupunta ba don si (bf)?” “Baka pinapatulog mo don” and I always answer No. I’m stern in always answering No. But I always get that “sting” on my chest for lying straight to my parents’ faces. But then, I can’t tell them about it because that would mean sacrificing my peace of mind. My mom and I don’t have that close mother-daughter relationship. She had been one of the reasons why I was suicidal 10 years ago. Don’t get me wrong. I love her, but sometimes I wish she just care less about me and just let me do things on my own. Naging away pa namin recently yung about sa pagrerent ko ng condo kasi I cut few bucks sa binibigay ko sa kanila every sahod. She even threatens me “1 year ka lang jan sa condo mo, uuwi ka na dito” Kaya minsan, I dread going home on weekends kasi it would mean sacrificing my peace of mind.

Hayyy. :(

Is lying about this whole thing okay? I just wanna know if someone out there is living the same situation as mine, I think that would give me comfort.

I love my parents. But I think I love them more when I’m away.

Previous Attempts: None