I feel… lost?

Writing this as I go may or may not be a long one

I (21M) just don’t know what I’m doing anymore in life the days just go by and I can’t help but feel left behind all the time. Honestly things started to improve but over the summer my best friend since middle school blocked me a day after we went to a concert together because a girl I used to date in high school and then went on to get with a different friend behind my back we ended up hooking up again at the time and I didn’t know she was messing around with my friend and he didn’t she was messing around with me still. So I talked to him about the experience and then that’s when he realized what was going on so he confronted her so she accused me of SAing her and he just immediately took her side and I haven’t heard anything from him in years flash forward to this concert this girl finds out I’m going to this concert and she tells my friend at the time GF that I SA’D her and he said he didn’t believe it but he couldn’t disrupt the “peacefulness” of his life to defend me.

Cut to a couple months ago my friend since preschool that I worked with and that I literally cried to because of everything that had previously happened I worked with just up and no called and showed one day and then ghosted me and haven’t heard anything since. I just feel so lost and like everyone hates me I do the best I can for everyone I have in my life because I know they’re all I have but I feel like I just keep getting betrayed I just don’t know what to do or how to carry on with just anything I’m so demoralized. I’m just so angry and sad I think about it every night it makes it hard to sleep.