Is this female intuition or am I deeping this?
Background: I (28 F) have been using the app Pure for a while and I met and have been seeing this guy (32 M) for just over 6 months. It's not anything more than casual I think I've only actually seen him maybe 3 or 4 times in person in that time. (Not that weird for me, I have a weird job and it's not like he's the only guy I've seen in that time) but we text quite a bit, I really enjoy his company and tbh I wouldn't mind seeing him more often (he is also the only guy from pure that I've seen multiple times). He was very upfront about not wanting anything serious (duh, it's Pure) and neither am I.
Anyway I just can't shake this strange feeling he is lying to me, but about stuff I've never indicated I would care about? Listen I'm here for one thing, the chit chat is just a nice extra, there is literally no reason to lie. He is also insanely secretive and something about it feels fishy. I'm going to list some of the weirdness below, trying not to be too specific just incase by some fluke he finds this/someone reconises him.
- He claims not to have a personal email address. How is that possible nowadays, like how do you pay bills? Or buy things online? - Sus
- He claims to have no social media at all. - Less sus, but weird for our generation. Even the most anti social media people have at least tiktok or Instagram.
- He is quite possibly the most offline person I have ever met. My mother in her 60's knows more than he does. I have dated way older than him before and yet I've had to explain the most basic internet slang etc. to him before. - Again less sus than the email, but still sus for a millennial.
- He claims to have gone to one of the most elite private schools in the country but doesn't have "the voice" (you know exactly what I mean) or any other dead giveaways. - Which I feel like most of us working class folk can smell from a mile. Sus.
- He consistently flakes on me. I don't mind, I'm not upset or offended, (this is why you have a roster ladies😉) but there is no universe where somebody is that busy. - SUS (note the capitalisation)
- He's insanely cocky about his work (This is the only thing that does make me think he's privately educated 🤣) but never very specific about what he does.- Not sure if this is sus, but felt like a bit of context.
There are other things but I'm not sure how much I can say without him becoming recognisable to people who might know him irl.
More relevant info:
- I have been to his house and I'm pretty sure he does not have a girlfriend, because I know that's going to be a lot of peoples first question.
- Mostly its a vibes thing. It's one of the few things I have a weird superpower for.
- There's slightly insecure part of me wonders if he just doesn't want anyone from his life to know about me. Don't get me wrong I'm great, but if everything he says about his life is true, I am the last person the world would expect him to be into. So maybe he's trying to give me as little info as possible just to make sure that the two don't mix. (Not that I have any reason or inclination to do so).
I genuinely couldn't give a fuck if he is or isnt that posh, if he does or doesn't have an email address. But the mystery of why you would lie about those things is what gets me, what does he have to gain? He's good in bed, whether he does or doesn't have a fancy job is irrelevant to that. I feel like I would understand if he was trying to impress me, but the horse has very much bolted in terms of getting me into bed. What are your thoughts people? I'm inclined to believe that he is telling the truth, because tbh I have some mad shit from my past that people would find hard to believe. BUT I have been told multiple times that I should trust my gut more.
Posted Dec 7, 2025, 11:42 PM UTC