Where did my bulbs go?

Last week I hung two brand-new strings of 100 C9 bulbs on a 25 foot tall spruce in my side yard.

It was very difficult. The job took about three hours, and I had to tape two long poles together just to barely reach the top working from a 10 ft stepladder. I’d tried an extension ladder to get higher but an extension ladder needs something to lean against sturdier than a pine tree. Being afraid of heights, and having brittle bones from cancer, I was happy to have this job finished. One bulb was located just a few inches down from the top working - I was especially proud of that one.

Last night I noticed they weren’t lit, so this evening I checked them. At first I thought a squirrel had chewed the wire. Or, maybe a neighbor didn’t like them and cut my wire. That theory didn’t last long because there are several houses nearby with far more garish displays than my one tree.

Then I realized there was a bulb missing, And then I saw there was more than one bulb missing. They were ALL GONE. There wasn’t a single bulb left of my 200 C9 bulbs, not even the one bulb at the very top of the 25 foot tall tree. Those bulbs cost about $150, and were very quickly sold out everywhere for the season, so there is no replacing them until next year.

I called the cops so I could do a police report.

The wires were not cut cleanly, with the cuts looking a little ragged as if chewed. The cop thought the rough cuts could have been the work of an animal. I tried to duplicate the cuts using my cheapest pliers, but couldn’t get a cut anywhere near as rough. One point in favor of the animal theory, I guess.

BUT, I also observed every bulb had been cut off exactly at the point where the wires enter the socket, and there were no cuts anywhere between bulbs. Whatever cut the bulbs off had very precisely cut only the wires which held the bulbs on. One point for the humans did this theory.

PLUS, not one bulb left behind, either on the tree or the ground below. 200 bulbs gone without a trace. Where would an animal put all those bulbs? And why? And how would they even carry that many bulbs away? Another point for the humans. This seems vastly more likely the work of the local teenagers.

But we live on a quiet street. What kind of ladder would a person need to get 25 feet up in the air - they got the top bulb, 25 from the ground, remember. How could a ladder that big be carried into our yard and nobody noticed? With the full moon we’ve had lately it’s fairly well lit out there. And there is minimal vehicle traffic on this street, and people walk past this house often.

Wouldn’t it have been quieter, safer and easier just to pull the wire off the tree while standing at ground level? They didn’t even unplug it.

Has anyone heard of bulbs being cut off C9 strings? Could this be a TikTok prank? If anyone has a theory on how 200 C9 bulbs disappeared from my tree, please let me know!