no-contact reestablished

i've posted on here a few times, i've deleted all my posts cuz i'm worried they'll somehow see and be able to tell who i am. the person in question is my best friend, we've been off-and-on no-contact, and by that i mean they keep breaking my boundaries and finding loopholes to get my attention, to reach me, to talk to others through me, it's fucking exhausting and i'm so sick of it. this has been going on, at it's worst, since april. in total, the obsession with me has lasted about a year.

i didn't read this over, so there might be typos. i'm just typing this in a random fit of anger honestly.

their jealousy knows no limits, they're jealous of my partner, jealous of ME that i have a partner, jealous of my friends, jealous of my interests, jealous of my hobbies. they've expressed genuine hatred and disgust for the things i love (shows, movies, etc), solely because my attention's on those things. they want me ALL to themself, but they also want everything i have to themself too. they've cried to me saying they feel abusive, months ago before it even got even worse. i had to bring in our friend as a mediator, to help me, because i was at a loss. they were insulted that i told someone, and they kept asking that friend '"what all has (me) said to you?", NUMEROUS times. it's scared me. we've had group discussions, our mediator friend trying to reason with my best friend to get them to see what they're doing and their entire way of thinking is just completely not okay. they listened to my friend, coupled with corporate, robotic apologies. but when i have expressed grief over everything, they reject it and lash back at me, trying to get me in a 'gotcha' by bringing up when i used to be insecure, scared of losing my spot as their best friend (i, however, was NEVER like them, and i never will be).

they've complained to mediator friend, saying how it's unfair how i've gotten a partner and apparently left my best friend, pwbpd, in the dust (i did not, we remained friends i just created some distance due to their obsession. they knew this). they tried spinning a story of how me and them were very clearly in love?? and told mediator friend how they "just realized" they were in love with me. i don't think they are, btw, i think they're just obsessed. mediator friend never believed any of the bullshit delusions either. i was never in love with my best friend and they knew this. they claimed the day i got with my partner was the 'worst day of their life'.

recently, mediator friend and my best friend got into a spat, mediator friend telling them flatout to leave me alone in a harsh way, but it ended fine enough. the next day, my best friend messages me, once again breaking no-contact, asking if what mediator friend said is true, and that it doesn't seem like me. being very clearly manipulative and trying to paint mediator friend as someone who's stretching the truth when i saw the entire argument, there was no truth to be stretched. basically seemed they were trying to create a rift, start drama, whatever. i put my foot down and told them to leave me alone, again, and defended mediator friend. basically saying it's not fair to dismiss what they had to say and to come to ME, expecting a different answer.

i'm hostile and resentful over this, i know, but after a year of this happening basically nonstop i feel nothing but bitterness towards this person. bpd is horrible thing to live with and i wouldn't wish it on anyone, but my best friend (again, pwbpd) is actively in therapy and doesn't seem to be improving at all, doesn't listen to my boundaries, doesn't listen to mediator friend telling them to leave me alone, doesn't listen to their therapist. if anything, they literally admitted to not being entirely truthful with their therapist, spinning a narrative where i'm the bad guy because... they got toxic towards me over my new interests, so i distanced myself a wee bit, and then got a partner? all the while maintaining our friendship?

all they want is me to themself, doing what they want me to do when they want me to do it.

during these no-contact periods, i feel relief. but along with that, i feel literal impending doom and absolute dread because every other time, no-contact has been broken by them pulling some stupid fucking stunt that leaves me scared of them. it leaves me thinking 'when's the next thing gonna happen'. it's been 2 days since i once again told them to leave me alone, i'm sure that dread will worm it's way into my mind soon.