4 months post-op - Pretty sure I tore my ACL again 😭

All was going well. I had full flexion and was back to my full hyper extension. I was feeling great, adding some strength training, and just being more active, but not overly so. We went on a trip where I did a bit of walking, but again, I didn’t overexert myself or anything. There was a moment where my knee gave a little, which it’d done a few times before, and I slid causing my other leg’s ankle to roll and knee to hurt a bit as it jerked the weight of my body back into balance. Hope I’m explaining that right. I went and iced the other ankle and knee and was just fine the next day, a little sore from the workout but fine. I was moving alright, like what had become the norm, and I was doing good.

When I went to my first PT, I was sore and a little achy, but it was mostly a workout kind of sore with a dull ache and not anything really concerning. That PT day I was made to do some kneeling exercises, by a therapist that doesn’t usually have me, where I put the full body weight from my rear onto my heels. Oh my gosh!!! It was awful! I hadn’t sat/knelt like that once since before surgery and being asked to do a whole set of these things where I kneel and come back up with each foot was crazy. It was the most uncomfortable pain, just a really odd stretch and it hurt so bad. I could barely do 1/3 of the set asked of me and it took me forever to do. I was practically in tears when I got back home.

At my first PT session this past week, I explained that something felt wrong and it was hurting really bad. I even showed her all of the fluid moving around near my kneecap. She took it a bit easier on me and told me we would monitor things and some stuff to do at home TL help with sweeping, etc.

I had to cancel my second PT session for the week because the pain was just too unbearable. I’ve done light basic stretches and PT exercises at home, but my leg keeps going back to being incredibly stiff and unable to bend. Since that day I’ve had to revert back to walking with my leg straight, as if in a brace again, and have had to take the stairs two feet per step again or just not take the stairs at all. On the colder days, I can’t even get out of bed or my car without wanting to break down and cry. Every time I stand I ache so bad and the wobble and weakness reminds me of how it felt when I ruptured it the first time.

I’m calling my surgeon tomorrow and seeing if he can see my early. Our next scheduled appointment isn’t until February. Maybe he can send me for another MRI which I’m so not looking forward to. What else should I do in the meantime? Does it sound like a retear in your opinion? I didn’t hear or feel any pops, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t happen. It definitely feels torn…